Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
