You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
