Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I accidentally burped into my bong.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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