Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
