Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
These tits shall not be calmed
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
