I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
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Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
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What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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