My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
