Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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