Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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