JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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