I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
why do cheetos always look like penises
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the liver wants what the liver wants
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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