i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
we made out on top of his cat.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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