I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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