ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Randomize
