Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My balls are so social today.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
