I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
