We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
My sheets look like a crime scene.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize