from now on my penis is your penis
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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