i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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