woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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