well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
