Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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