perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
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