Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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