i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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