that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
We named our party play list daddy issues
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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