Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
where am i from again
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
