If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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