She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize