"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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