Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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