They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize