OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
