I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
