Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.