I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
