I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize