great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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