Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
