that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
