Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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