Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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