plz talk dirty to me
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Girls should come with a carfax report
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize