yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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