I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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