He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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