Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
