she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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