Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
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Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
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I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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