i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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